


Dreaming in an Empty Bed

by casual_distance



Series: Secret Places [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: (but no actual miscarriage happens), Alpha Sam, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Anger, Angst, Anxiety, Depression, Grief/Mourning, Happy Ending, M/M, Minor Sexual Content, Mpreg, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega Adam, Omega Castiel, Omega Dean, Omega Jo, Omega Meg, Omega/Omega, discussion of miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-03 01:29:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10956867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casual_distance/pseuds/casual_distance
Summary: When Castiel’s alpha is killed, he is given to a government auction house where he waits to be sold to another alpha. He shares a room with a dozen other omegas, works for food and his bed, and tries not to think about what’s to come. He tries not to think about Dean, or Dean’s baby, which grows inside him. He tries not to think about the life he should have had.





	Dreaming in an Empty Bed

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote almost 50k worth of words as follow up to a 3k fic. How did this happen?
> 
>  **Content warnings:** There’s still the theme of rape and abuse in this fic, but it’s far less pronounced than in The Golden Lock. This fic focuses more on Castiel’s PTSD (grief, depression, anger, etc.). It does have a happy ending, but things get worse before they get better. 
> 
> Additionally, there’s a scene where Dean is put on display in a sexual context and it’s mentioned that Dean has been given drugs against his will. No physical touching happens in this scene, but it’s clearly a non-consensual situation. There’s consensual sexual touching between Dean and Castiel in the following scene as a direct result of that situation, but it’s not erotic to either of them and their behavior reflects that.

Castiel keeps his eyes lowered. It's the only deference he can bring himself to offer. He can't bring himself to bow his shoulders or bend his knees, can't bring himself to fold over and look smaller. He can't even control the curl of his lip when the alpha reaches out to put a hand on his stomach. Castiel's arms come up without his say and he barely manages to wrap them around his stomach, round with his pregnancy, instead of knocking the alpha's hand away.

The alpha's hand freezes just shy of touching. Castiel watches the fingers flex and then the alpha pulls his hand away. He doesn't mean to, but Castiel looks up at the alpha through his eyelashes. He makes eye contact and holds it, just for a heartbeat, but Castiel knows a heartbeat is all it takes.

He drops his eyes down again, covers his stomach a little more.

The alpha makes a noise in the back of his throat and moves way. Castiel shudders out a sigh.

"Back to your room." The beta in charge of him pushes on his shoulder. Castiel stumbles slightly, his balance off, but he rights himself and makes his way back to his room.

The room. Castiel can't claim ownership of a room that's filled with cots. He can't claim ownership of a space he shares with a dozen other omegas. He can’t even claim ownership over the clothes he’s wearing; they aren’t the ones he wore yesterday and they won’t be the ones he wears tomorrow.

The beta leaves him just inside the door to the room, so Castiel heads for the bathroom; his bladder seems to grow smaller every day. He pauses after he's washed his hands and studies himself in the mirror. It's cracked and warped, but it's enough for him to see the way his skin has grown pale and dark bags have developed under his eyes. His body seems torn between being on the edge of too thin and round with pregnancy. Castiel straightens and turns to check his profile. He smooths his shift over his stomach, making the curve of it pronounced.

The baby kicks and Castiel releases his hold on his shift. He shouldn't do this to himself. He shouldn't be curious, shouldn't want to know. He won't be able to keep this baby, no matter what happens.

If he gives birth in this place, they'll take it from him to give it to a couple looking to adopt. If an alpha buys him while he’s pregnant, at best he can hope to be his baby's nanny. He'll never get to be a parent.

So he shouldn’t want to be.

Castiel leaves the bathroom. He goes to his cot and sits down on it. He knows he should stay up, stay moving. He's got responsibilities- there's a basket of sewing on the foot of his bed he is expected to finish today- but his limbs are heavy. His hands fumble with his sheets, fingers tangling. His head rolls on his neck as he struggles to keep it upright, just a little longer. He lowers himself to his side. He doesn't even drag his feet up on the bed before fatigue drags him under.

He doesn't fight it.

 

* * *

 

A hand on his shoulder startles him awake. Castiel flails, but the person catches his hand.

"Easy now, Castiel," a voice says.

Castiel blinks sleep from his eyes. His fingers curl around the hand holding his. Hannah watches him, waiting until he nods at her. She helps him sit up.

"You've been bought," she tells him. Castiel's fingers tighten convulsively, but she doesn't flinch. She has a short sort of compassion, one that’s hard and unfailing, but one that Castiel finds himself leaning on.

She cares, makes sure their beds and clothes are clean, that they are warm enough. She makes sure everyone gets enough food. It would make a difference if she were not the only one to do so. 

Most importantly, Hannah does not pretend like this is anything other than what it is. Castiel wants to hate her sometimes, but then there are times like this, when Castiel only wants to hear the truth and he finds himself grateful for her plain words.

"Bought?" he asks, his voice rough with sleep. He coughs a little, and Hannah hands him a glass of water.

It's tepid and tastes like metal, but it soothes his throat. 

"The alpha you met this morning. Can you stand? He wants to take you now."

Castiel lets her help him up. He needs the bathroom again, so she walks him over. Afterwards, she leads him to a room he's never seen. He's given a nicer set of clothes- a wrap-around skirt he winds around his stomach carefully, a loose shirt that hides the way his breasts are beginning to swell. Underwear. Shoes that are too tight. He hasn't showered in a couple of days; his turn would have been tomorrow. Hannah sprays him lightly with perfume. The smell of it makes him nauseated and he waves his hand to clear the air.

Hannah opens a door on the other side of the room to reveal an omega waiting for him. The omega is young, short. He has dark blond hair cropped close to his head. He wears a loose top and slacks that fit him well. Castiel glances down to find that he's wearing simple slip-on shoes. He stands comfortably so Castiel knows they are the right size.

"Hello, Castiel," he greets. 

Castiel looks up at him warily. He offers a smile and suddenly Castiel can't breathe. He turns his face away, blinking back tears, his arms wrapping around his stomach. 

"Castiel?" 

The omega touches his shoulder and Castiel pulls away from him. He forces himself to breath deeply, forces himself calm. When he turns back to the omega, Castiel finds him watching, frowning lightly.

"Are you okay?"

For a moment, the lines of the omega's face had reminded him of Dean. Had made Castiel think of the last time he'd seen Dean, across the dining hall of Dean's alpha's home. Dean had been swathed in fabrics again, but he'd caught Castiel's eyes and he had smiled widely, looking down to where Castiel's stomach- just barely rounded with pregnancy- was on display. When he'd looked back up, his face had been radiant with joy.

Castiel pushes away all thoughts of Dean and nods.

"I'm Adam," the omega introduces. He reaches out for Castiel's arm, and when he doesn't flinch away, he wraps his own around it. He guides Castiel from the room with gentle pressure.

A beta opens the door for them and Castiel finds himself outside. He lifts his face to the heat of the sun, eyes closing without intention. It's warm and a cool breeze blows past them, ruffling Castiel's skirt around his ankles. Castiel sighs, breathes fresh air in deep.

He opens his eyes to find the omega watching him. His face is twisted into a grimace, but he doesn't ask how long it's been since Castiel has been outside. 

Adam leads him through the small courtyard. Castiel glances over his shoulder to find that they've left through the alpha entrance- the main one. They make their way to the driveway where a long car sits. Castiel's never seen anything like it, and he frowns. Adam doesn't explain, just guides him toward the end of it. He opens the door and helps Castiel inside before sliding in after him.

The car takes off, making Castiel sway gently. He closes his eyes against a surge of nausea. A hand touches his knee and Castiel startles, eyes snapping open again. Adam holds out a bag.

"In case you are going to be sick."

He isn't, but Castiel takes it anyway, setting it on his legs in front of his stomach.

"We're heading home," Adam says without prompting. "Well, your new home I guess. We've got a room ready for you, and Sam's set up a doctor's appointment for you. He's got an omega specialist on staff."

Castiel narrows his eyes in suspicion and listens as Adam rambles on. He talks about Castiel's room and how they've got a few clothes for him, but they're generic, designed to fit most sizes. He keeps mentioning a Sam, but Castiel isn't sure who that is. He watches Adam until Adam catches his look.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

Castiel bites his tongue to keep from asking any questions, but Adam seems to know what he wants anyway.

"Oh, I guess you don't know about Sam, huh? He's our alpha."

Castiel frowns. He curls his fingers tighter around the bag Adam had given him.

"You'll like him," Adam says.

Castiel scent spikes. Unwashed, it's already potent, but the suspicion and uncontrollable fear only heightens it. Adam flinches. He starts to cover his face, but forces his hand down to his lap where he slots his fingers together.

"I promise he's a good guy," Adam continues. He stares at Castiel, his face earnest. "He's my brother. He's never hurt me. He takes really good care of me."

Castiel glares. His scent gives away his mistrust, sours in the interior of the car. Castiel scoots further down the seat away from Adam. Adam watches, his scent sharpening with distress, his mouth pulling down unhappily, but Castiel has no concern for the feelings of an omega who would sing praises of an alpha, especially not one who has just bought an omega.

They spend the rest of the drive in silence. Adam rolls down a window when Castiel's scent stays sour. Castiel turns his head so that he can watch the scenery go by, but keeps Adam in his peripheral. He won't be able to fight- he's weighed down with his stomach and Adam is several years younger and much healthier- but Castiel wants to see the attack coming at least.

Adam stays on his side of the car. He busies himself with a book, reading until the car turns off the main road. Then he folds it away and looks out the window. They travel along a small road lined with trees, slowing when they come to a gate. Castiel can see the house in the distance, large and white and looming. They enter the gate, and he watches the house grow and spread across his line of sight until there's nothing left for him to see but the house.

Resignation settles in his bones. The baby rolls nervously in his stomach.

"Castiel..." Adam says softly.

Castiel looks over to find him with his hand stretched out, fingers inches from Castiel's arm. Castiel bares his teeth and presses himself flat against the car door. Adam's hand drops. 

"We're here. Let me show you to your room."

Castiel eases himself out the door. Adam circles around, coming to a stop beside him, his hand on the door. He waits until Castiel has moved aside and then pushes it shut. He reaches out again, but stops himself before Castiel can react. Instead he points toward the house and then starts walking.

Castiel follows behind him. They walk up the steps and to the front door. Castiel watches nervously. Most alphas disdain having their omegas enter through the main door, but Adam doesn't veer away. 

The front door opens to reveal a woman. She's short with dark hair and a round face. Her lips are painted bright red. She smirks at Adam before her gaze cuts away to take in Castiel. She purses her lips, eyes dipping down his body before drawing back up. When she meets Castiel's gaze again, she winks.

"Nice," she comments to Adam who snorts.

"Leave him alone, Meg. We need to get him settled."

"I can do it. Sam was asking for you."

Adam frowns at her, studying her face for a moment before he nods. He turns back to Castiel. "Meg will take you to your room."

Castiel stares at him until he sighs. He runs a hand through his hair. Castiel watches the movement of his hand and is suddenly in a quiet, dimly lit room. Dean paces in front of him, hands fluttering nervously, reaching up to grip the back of his neck, running through his hair to leave it such a mess that Castiel wants to- 

Sudden resentment burns through Castiel's gut. His upper lip curls back in warning. Adam makes an annoyed noise in the back of his throat. He waves a hand at Meg and turns on his heel to stride into the house, leaving Castiel alone with her.

She laughs and gestures for Castiel to come inside. She closes the door behind them and then guides him to a hallway just off the main entry.

"We're all housed in this wing," Meg says as they walk. Castiel can smell her now: another omega.

"We've got our own rooms. No sharing for these pets." She winks at Castiel over her shoulder. "We've got our own private kitchen and movie room- whatever. We can go anywhere we want, but we're the only ones allowed here. Except for Sam, of course."

Castiel frowns at her, but he is used to jealous alphas; this will be nothing new.

Meg stops in front of a closed door. She twists the knob to open it and then steps out of the way.

"Here's your room. Closet, bathroom. Phone if you need anything. List of phone numbers are there. There's clothes, but Sammy-boy said we could take you shopping when you're ready. Anyway- I got things to do." Meg wiggles her fingers at him, then leaves him standing in the doorway to the room that is now his.

Unlike his previous room, this one is soft and warm. The floor is carpeted. Curtains cover a small window. The bed looks soft, covered with multiple pillows and a comforter. There is no lingering smell of omega- just the scent of laundry soap and cleaner. Castiel steps into the room. He stands in the middle of it and looks around. He turns back to close the door. It has a lock, so he flicks it. His heart pounds in his chest at the action. His rooms have only ever had locks on the outside.

Castiel makes his way across the room to the closet. It's the biggest he's ever had, deep enough he could step into it and close the door behind himself. Shirts and dresses hang from the rod. The shelves in the corner hold shirts, pants, skirts. On one shelf there's a basket with underwear in a variety of styles. Another basket has socks. Castiel flicks through the clothes to see that they are all pregnancy clothes.

He leaves the closet and heads for the bathroom. Inside is a tub, a toilet, and a sink. Castiel opens the cabinets under the sink to find towels and washcloths neatly folded. Soap and a bottle of shampoo sit inside the shower on a shelf.

Castiel reaches up to twist his fingers through his hair. It's slick with grease, clumping wetly. He glances around the bathroom again before he starts pulling off his clothes. He leaves them piled on the floor. He turns on the water, fiddling with it until it starts to warm up.

He lets it run while he uses the toilet. Afterwards, curious, he closes the bathroom door. It has a lock too. He flips it. A strange sort of satisfaction wells in him, but he forces it back. An alpha with this much money would not be held back by a such a simple lock. Castiel will not fall for a false sense of security.

With a shake of his head, Castiel turns away. He steps into the tub and tugs the shower curtain closed. He pulls up the stopper on the faucet and lifts his face into the warm spray of water. He stays like that for a long time, The showers at the auction house only ran cold. Whatever warm water there might have been was gone early and quick. Even at his alpha's house- his old alpha's house- he'd been forced to bathe and the water had never been more than lukewarm.

This water is hot. It stings his skin, makes it pull tight. Steam fills the shower. Castiel inhales damp air again and again until he's sobbing with it.

He washes his hair twice, then scrubs his skin so that what's not already brightened from the heat of his shower blushes bright red. He knocks down the stopper so water rushes into the tub. He sits down and puts the plug into place so that the tub fills with water. It rises slowly around him, covering his legs, his stomach, crawling up his chest. He stops it before it floods over the edges and then he sits there until the water cools off.

 

* * *

 

" _Wakey, wakey_ ,” a voice sing-songs through the door, startling Castiel awake. He sits up, the comforter falling off his shoulders. He squints in the dim light of the room. 

"Claarreeence," the voice calls. Castiel frowns at the door. He climbs out of bed to unlock it and crack it open. Meg stares back at him, mouth curled up in a smile.

"Well, look who's awake."

"Who's Clarence?" he asks.

"Breakfast is ready," Meg says without answering him.

Castiel squints at her, then pushes the door shut. He flicks the lock, ignoring Meg's irritated scoff. He uses the bathroom and changes out of his nightgown. He pulls on pants and a soft shirt. Outside his room, Meg is still waiting for him, leaning against the wall across the hall.

She leads him down the hall away from the main entryway. She points at various rooms, naming occupants (Adam, Jo, Tessa) or listing uses (library, TV room, whatever). The hallway ends on the kitchen. It's large and spacious, brightly lit with two large windows, curtains pulled back to let in the sunlight.

A young woman stands at the stove, blond hair tied up in a knot. She glances over her shoulder at the two of them, eyes trailing over his body briefly before she turns her attention to Meg. 

"Food's almost ready if you want to get plates. I'm Jo, by the way," she says to Castiel.

Castiel sits while Meg opens a cabinet and pulls out five plates and five glasses. She sets a plate in front of Castiel and then sets two before empty chairs. She leaves the last two stacked in the center of the table. She fills two glasses with juice but leaves the other three empty. 

"Milk for me," Jo tells her. 

She brings the pan over and spoons out a helping of eggs onto the three plates. She leaves the pan on the stove, covered, as she makes toast. Meg brings over Jo's milk and silverware. Castiel waits until they've started eating before he picks at his own food. His stomach rumbles noisily; Castiel hasn't eaten since yesterday morning.

 

Meg laughs, her head thrown back, and Jo smirks at him. Castiel shoves a bite of eggs in his mouth and moans at the flavor. The last time he'd had something this delicious was the Lock. He eats quickly, barely swallowing before he's eating another mouthful of eggs, taking bites of toast in between. He's nearly done with his meal when Jo catches his attention.

"So you're Castiel?"

He nods.

"Can I call you Cas?" she asks.

Castiel's chest tightens so sharply he can’t breathe. His throat burns with acid and he barely has enough time to make it to the kitchen sink before he's throwing up in it. Afterwards he clutches the edge of the sink, eyes closed, breathing deeply.

Someone touches his arm. Castiel looks over to find Jo offering him a glass of water. He takes it as she reaches past him to run water into the sink and wash away his mess. He rinses his mouth, then drinks what's left.

He says, "No."

"No?"

"My name is Castiel."

He looks at Jo. She studies him, her eyes flicking back and forth. She glances at Meg, who shrugs. When she looks back at Castiel, he stares at her until she dips her head.

"Fine. Castiel."

He turns away to finish cleaning out the sink. He fixes himself a smaller serving of eggs and eats them slowly this time. It stays down. It's only when he's done eating, his plates stacked in the sink, that Meg stands.

"Come on. You've got a doctor's appointment."

He frowns and rubs a hand over his stomach. He considers refusing, but he's only had a few cursory exams since he ended up at the auction house months ago.

They don't leave the property. The doctor’s office is in a small building just off the main house. A nurse welcomes them, gesturing for Meg to sit in the small waiting room before he takes Castiel down a hallway lined with doors. Only one is open, letting Castiel see inside to a plain white room with a bed that adjusts and medical devices half-hidden in shadow beneath unlit florescent lights.

The room he's left alone in has a small bed covered with paper, a sink tucked into the corner, and two chairs. The nurse hands Castiel a gown and asks him to change.

"Please leave your underwear off. The doctor is going to want to do a full exam."

Castiel grimaces, but obeys.

The doctor is a beta man, older than Castiel, but still young. A beta woman accompanies him. The doctor reads through the chart in his hands. From where Castiel sits, he can see that there's only a few sheets.

"How far along are you?" the doctor asks without looking at him.

"Five or six months."

The doctor hums. "Well, you're a bit underweight. Sam said he bought you from an auction house?"

Castiel nods.

"They are notorious for underfeeding so I'd say your weight is fine for the situation. I do want you to start eating more though." He sets the chart on the counter and pulls out a notepad. "I'm going to recommend a diet for you until you're on target. Then we'll make some minor adjustments."

He doesn't show Castiel what he's writing or explain the diet to him. Castiel frowns, but he can't bring himself to ask. The doctor clicks his pen closed and then stands. For the first time, he looks Castiel over, his gaze uninterested and brief.

"Okay. Gown off, I'm going to do a quick physical exam."

Castiel hesitates. His fingers twist into the front of his gown. He glances at the beta woman. She smiles reassuringly at him. They both wait patiently for Castiel to slip off the table and ease open the gown.

First the doctor scents him, stepping into Castiel's space and pressing his nose into the column of Castiel's neck. Castiel flinches back from the touch, his shoulders hunching. The air in the room sours, but neither the doctor nor the nurse react. Instead, the doctor touches him more. He runs his hands over Castiel's chest and stomach, pressing and feeling, a frown on his face. He cups Castiel's balls. He has Castiel bend over and slips a gloved, slicked finger into him, but he doesn't do anything more than feel around. He offers Castiel paper towels when he's done and lets Castiel wipe himself clean.

"Would you like to do an ultrasound?" the doctor asks as he pulls off his gloves and drops them into the trash.

"What's that?"

"It lets us see the baby."

Castiel hesitates, but agrees. He pulls on his gown again, the opening in the front this time, and the nurse helps him get settled on the table, the end lifted up so Castiel can lie back. She wheels a monitor into the room, and Castiel watches as she flips switches and manipulates the device. She moves to his other side so the doctor can take her place. After she squirts a gel onto Castiel stomach, the doctor takes a wand and rubs it through the gel, spreading it around. A rhythmic thumping, high and fast, fills the air.

"Ah." The doctor points at the monitor.

It looks like a bunch of squiggles on the screen. Castiel frowns at it until the doctor starts outlining the shape of Castiel's baby. Castiel draws in a shuddering breath. 

"What's that noise?" he asks as he watches his baby move on the screen.

"That's the heartbeat."

Castiel blinks. He glances down at his stomach, then up at the monitor again. He can't stop staring. When the doctor moves the wand away, his baby's heartbeat going silent, its shape fading from the monitor, Castiel whines, biting back the sound at the last second. Both the nurse and the doctor laugh. Castiel slinks down against the bed, embarrassed. The doctor hands the wand to the nurse who presses it against his stomach again. Castiel stares at the monitor again, riveted.

"We're going to take a few blood samples and run some tests," the doctor says. "Preliminarily, everything looks good, but we want to be sure of that."

Castiel nods absently. They let him watch his baby as a second nurse comes in and takes blood from his arm. Castiel wants to stay all day, but in the end, the nurse takes the wand away and cleans up Castiel's stomach. He dresses slowly, eyes darting back to the monitor as he does.

When he exits the room, the nurse is waiting to take him back to Meg. Before he leaves, she touches his arm and gives him a sheet of paper. He looks down to find that it's a picture of his baby. He cradles it to his chest and gives her a grateful look. She smiles and squeezes his arm.

 

* * *

 

Castiel wakes in the middle of the night, his heart pounding from a nightmare. He stays curled up for a moment until his bladder insists he get out of bed. It's strange to wake like this, warm and comfortable. It's stranger still to be able to slip from his bed onto a warm floor, to use a bathroom that only he has ever been in. He can turn on the light and make noise and he will disturb no one else.

In the dim light of his room, lit only by the small lamp he leaves on by his bedside, it all feels surreal. Castiel wonders if he's dreaming, but when he climbs into bed, he turns to find the picture of his baby propped up against the lamp. He reaches out to drag it closer. He remembers the sound of his baby's heart, the gentle thumping of it filling the air. He couldn't dream that. He wouldn't even know how to dream that.

Castiel traces the curve of his baby's spine and head. He doesn't know for sure that the baby is Dean's, not really. He wants it to be. He prays every day that it is. But he just as often prays that it isn't. He won't get to keep it, he knows that. He didn't get to keep Dean. Why would he get to keep Dean's child? 

Castiel puts the picture face down on the side table. He tugs the blankets up over his head and forces himself to fall asleep again.

 

* * *

 

Castiel doesn't meet his new alpha for nearly a week, and when he does, it's by chance.

Castiel wanders from his room. He still yet to leave the omega wing to explore the rest of the house, but he's taken to wandering the garden, where it’s easy for him to pretend that he's still at the Golden Lock. Dean, he imagines, has gotten bored enough with the pool and the library to approach the staff about putting on a play, maybe something with the kids. Charlie and Gilda have taken over the room, and Castiel knows that when he and Dean return it will smell like slick.

It's a dangerous fantasy, but that doesn't keep Castiel from imagining it.

He doesn't notice anyone else in the garden, not until a voice calls out to him.

"Hello!"

Castiel startles, spinning to find a man sitting off the path on a bench that's tucked under a tree. Castiel squints at him. The man waves.

"Come over here and sit! You look tired."

Castiel hesitates, watching him. The man just smiles at him. He tucks a lock of hair behind his ear and closes his book over his finger. Castiel leaves the path and makes his way to the tree. Up close, Castiel realizes how large the man is- tall, but also broad shouldered. His long legs are crossed at the ankle and tucked under the bench. He wears jeans and a button down shirt, the sleeves rolled up his arms. His hair falls to his shoulders. He studies Castiel just as Castiel studies him, though his expression is open where Castiel knows his is suspicious.

"Who are you?" the man asks.

"Castiel."

"Oh!" The man nods in recognition. The wind changes direction, blowing his scent toward Castiel just as he says, "I'm Sam."

Castiel's body locks up in fear. He stares at Sam- at _his alpha_ \- until Sam starts frowning. 

"Is everything okay?" Sam rises.

Castiel takes a step back before he can stop himself. He ducks his head- he does not bare his throat- and wraps his arms around his stomach.

Sam doesn't come closer. For a long time, he doesn't say anything. When he does, it's only to say, "You can sit if you would like."

Castiel wants to go back to his room. Instead he forces himself over to the bench. He sits as far away as he can. He keeps his eyes on the grass and his arms wrapped around his stomach.

Sam sighs. "I'm not going to hurt you, Castiel."

Castiel nods once, and they are silent again. Sam shifts beside him. He sighs again, then says, "You may go."

Castiel barely remembers to acknowledge the order before he's off the bench and headed for the house. He goes to his room and locks the door behind him, leaning up against it and drawing in deep breaths. The baby wiggles uncomfortably. Castiel presses a hand against his side. He waits until the baby settles and then he goes to lie down.

It takes him a long time to get comfortable, intermittent pains in his sides making sleep nearly impossible.

When someone knocks on his door that evening, Castiel ignores them. Not long after Meg returns, banging on his door loudly.

"You have to come eat," she tells him through the door. "Sam said to make sure you follow your diet."

Castiel scowls at the door. "I don't feel good."

"That's what the diet is for!"

Castiel tugs his covers higher and ignores her. Jo comes next, but she's kinder, knocking on his door and telling him there's a tray outside for him. Castiel waits until he's certain she's gone before he slips out of bed to retrieve it.

He stays in his bedroom for a few more days, eating only the food left for him outside his door. Meg is the one to lure him out, waiting until he opens his door to bring in lunch. He finds her sitting on the floor, back against the wall opposite his door, his lunch in her lap. She looks up at him, one eyebrow raised, mouth pursed in irritation.

He stares at her before turning and leaving her there. He doesn't close his door behind him, though, and she accepts the invitation. She sets the tray down on the foot of his bed.

"You can't just live in here," she tells him as she climbs up to sit next to him.

He shrugs at her.

"What happened anyway?"

Castiel drags the tray into his lap and eats, picking at the sandwich, taking careful bites.

"Ooo-kay." She sighs. She fidgets while he eats until he elbows her in the side. She rolls her eyes at him, but gets off the bed and starts wandering his room.

She pulls open the closet doors to look at his clothing. "We still haven't gone shopping."

"I don't need new clothes."

"What about what you _want?_ " she asks.

Castiel doesn't answer, so she picks through the books he's piled up on his bedside table.

"I never asked, but what happened to your alpha?"

Castiel drops the remainder of his sandwich on the tray and pushes it away. He rests his head back against the wall. "Dead."

"Oh, so he didn't drop you?"

Castiel glances over at her. "No. He wanted the baby." Castiel smooths his hand over his stomach and watches as Meg turns on the light in his bathroom. "He got into a fight."

Meg turns around and leans up against the doorjamb, folding her arms across her chest. "Your alpha got into a fight," she repeats.

Castiel sighs. "He wasn't very smart."

"Bar fight?"

Castiel nods. "I got sick a lot, in the beginning. So he would." Castiel flicks his fingers. If Meg's been around, if she'd been owned before Sam, she’ll understand.

She must, because her lips pull back to bare her teeth before she gets herself under control. She turns away from him and starts poking around his bathroom again. She kicks at the pile of clothes that he's left on the floor.

"Let me at least show you the laundry room. This place stinks."

Castiel glares, but she only smirks.

 

* * *

 

Meg takes him into the basement, helping him carry a basket of his clothes. She shows him the machines, but Castiel is already familiar with them. She tells him he can leave them there- no one is going to take his things- but Castiel prefers to stay. He sits in a small wooden chair that wobbles beneath his weight. Meg sits on the floor next to him.

They don't talk, not that much, nothing beyond Meg telling him what she'd been doing the last couple of days. She talks about Jo and Tessa, whom he has not spoken to yet, and Adam. Castiel watches her carefully when she talks about Adam, but she doesn't look or sound bothered by him.

"I met Sam," Castiel says when she stops talking.

Meg looks up at him. "What'd you think?"

Castiel focuses on the washing machine. It vibrates as it spins, nearing the end of its cycle. Castiel stands and waits for it to wind down. Meg watches him as he transfers the clothes to the dryer.

"He's not as bad as most alphas," Meg says when Castiel finally turns back to look at her.

Castiel frowns.

"I mean, don't get me wrong- he's still an alpha and all that. But- He's never put his hands on me." She sighs. "Not that that's much of- whatever." She stretches her legs out in front of her. "Is that why you've been hiding in your room?"

Castiel shrugs.

"Yeah, I don't blame you. Took me almost a month to want to come out of my room." Her eyes focus on something Castiel can't see, her head turned away. She frowns, mouth pulling down. Her fingers twist in the fabric of her shirt and her scent- soft, touched with something sharp that pulls at him in the same way biting into a lemon puckers his mouth- grows sour and heavy. Castiel waits until she pulls herself from her memories.

She waves a hand as if to clear the air.

"This place grows on you." She grimaces, and he knows exactly what she means.

 

* * *

 

Castiel lets Meg take him out after that. He follows her around the house, helping where he can with her chores. He's sore and aching, his stomach unhappy most days, but he hates being idle. He learns that Jo, Meg, and Adam are the only omegas who reside regularly in the mansion. Other omegas come and go, transferring out to other estates owned by their alpha. 

Castiel doesn't know if he believes Meg when she tells him that, but she's the only one who doesn't like Sam that much. The few times Castiel has interacted with Adam, he still tried to convince Castiel of Sam's kindness. Jo says she likes him well enough and that Castiel just needs to give him time.

He meets Tessa once. She slender with pale skin and dark hair. She sits in the kitchen with him quietly, asking soft questions of him, unperturbed with Castiel refuses to answer most of them.

"It'll be okay, I think," Tessa says before she leaves. "I'm going to a better place."

Castiel doesn't understand what she means. A couple days later, she and Jo leave. Meg says Jo is taking her to another estate. She seems unconcerned, so Castiel forces himself to let it go. 

He wouldn't be able to save her anyway.

 

* * *

 

Castiel stands at the bottom of the stairs and stares up them. There's a library on the second floor, larger than the one in the omega wing. Castiel has spent some time there while Meg completed her responsibilities. None of the betas in residence had bothered him then and he knows they won't bother him now if goes alone.

He still hesitates, uncertain about being alone on an upper floor and slow moving. The baby shifts in his stomach. Castiel presses his palm to it and looks down. He misses the footsteps coming toward him.

"Castiel, is everything-"

A broad palm lands on the nape of his neck, fingers curling in to hold him. Castiel's head snaps up and he finds himself face-to-face with Sam. For a moment, he freezes, fear locking his muscles in place. Then Sam's fingers tighten in his neck. 

Fury explodes in his chest and Castiel slams his palms into Sam's chest, pushing him back. Sam lets go of him, but Castiel doesn't stop; he keeps pushing, fingers clawed, teeth bared. His blood runs hot and all he can think is that another alpha is touching him when he doesn't want it. He's touching him and the baby isn't _his._ The baby is _Dean's_ and Dean is the only who can touch him and why does this alpha think he can just come into Castiel's life and act like nothing that's happened before matters how can these other omegas pretend like nothing’s wrong this alpha has tricked them but Castiel isn't going to fall for it because he _knows- Castiel knows_ -

Pain sends Castiel to his knees, his stomach cramping tightly. He cries out and doubles over, wrapping his arms around himself. He pants through the pain. Slowly he realizes someone is saying his name. Castiel raises his eyes to find Meg kneeling in front of him, her hands hover in the air between them.

"Castiel, what's wrong?"

"Hurts," he grits out as another cramp tightens his stomach. He moans and curls over. Meg settles a hand against his shoulder.

"We're getting the doctor, Clarence. You just hold on."

" _Who_ is Clarence?" Castiel grits out. 

Meg laughs, but she runs a hand through his hair, the touch soft. "I'll show you one day," she says.

The doctor arrives with a stretcher. He and Meg help Castiel to his feet and onto it. As Castiel lies back, he catches sight of Sam sitting on a step, watching. His face is scratched, purple spreading across one cheek, blood streaking his skin and his shirt. A woman in scrubs is wiping at his face with a washcloth. Jo and Adam stand next to him. Adam leans close asking Sam questions, but Jo is watching Castiel.

He meets her eyes and then turns away. They can do no worse to him than has already been done.

 

* * *

 

The doctor sedates him to do tests. Castiel wakes in a bed in the clinic, one of the private rooms he'd seen on his first visit. An IV is in his arm. Meg sits in a guest chair, her feet propped up on the end of his bed, watching the small TV mounted on the opposite wall.

When he shifts, she looks over at him.

"Finally," she sighs and then goes back to her movie.

"What happened?" Castiel asks. His voice is rough, his throat dry. He coughs until Meg sighs and gets up to pour him a cup of water.

"Well, you attacked Sam. Then you collapsed. The doc ran some tests. He'll be by later."

Castiel hands the cup back to her and rests his head against his pillow. "Is the baby okay?" he asks.

"Yeah, it's fine."

Castiel closes his eyes. He doesn't sleep, just drifts in between. He hears Meg turn up the volume on the TV. A woman comes in and they talk. Castiel hears a man's voice just a moment before a touch on his arm startles him into full consciousness.

He jerks away from the touch, but Meg's already there, cooing under her breath at him. He lets her settle him.

The doctor tells him that it was close, that he nearly lost the baby, even this far along. He's expected to stay on bed rest. His movement is to be restricted and if he needs to go on long trips, he is expected to use a wheelchair.

Castiel wants to argue. He wants to tell them that his confinement doesn't need to be hidden behind his baby. If they want him locked in his room, they should just do it. He doesn't. Instead he lowers his eyes and lets the doctor talk at him.

He ignores Meg when she tries to get him to talk. Jo visits, but Castiel refuses to look at her. He remembers the way she stood by Sam.

He waits for Sam to visit, but he does not. When the doctor shows up with a wheelchair, Castiel expects to find himself taken out front and shoved into a government car that will take him back to the auction house. Instead, he is taken to his room. Meg helps him into bed.

Castiel continues to wait.

Meg brings him books, but he doesn't read them. He curls into a ball in his bed and sleeps. Meg opens the curtains on his window and Castiel spends days watching clouds float past the window, watching rain streak down the glass, watching birds and bugs and, once, a lizard wander past. Meg reads to him. She brings a TV into his room. She yells at him and pulls him from bed to shove him into the shower. He sits in the bottom of the tub and lets her scrub his hair and his skin. He eats when she puts a tray in front of him.

He waits.

Sam comes to him. He stands in the doorway and looks around Castiel's room, mouth pulled down into a frown. He eyes Castiel where he lies still in his bed. 

"May I come in?" Sam asks. 

Castiel nods because his alpha is expecting an answer and it’s the only one he can give. He remembers finally to lower his eyes and stares at the bedspread while Sam drags Meg's chair out from the corner of Castiel's room to the foot of his bed. He sits in it with a heavy sigh.

"Meg says you aren't talking."

Castiel folds his hands in his lap, tucked partially under his stomach, but he says nothing.

"I'm not going to kick you out, if that's what you're worried about. I shouldn't have touched you without warning."

Castiel frowns. He glances toward Sam without lifting his eyes, but he can only see the alpha's legs and the restless finger he taps against his thigh.

"Meg told me that you asked questions about some of the omegas that have come through here." When Castiel says nothing, Sam continues. "I'm looking for someone, my brother. My dad sold him when I was younger and I want him back. I... I buy omegas so that... I don't think this is right. I don't think the fact that auction houses exist is right. Omegas shouldn't be treated as if they are expendable."

Castiel closes his eyes. He hands ball into fists. He reminds himself that the reason he cannot leave this bed is because of his baby, of Dean's baby.

"Anyway, they're not being hurt. I have other properties. Places they can go where there aren't alphas and where no alpha can go."

Castiel snorts at that. Sam gives a soft laugh.

"I know. But it's true. I just want to find my brother." He sighs. "I also wanted to... I know the father of your baby is an omega."

Castiel's head jerks up then. He stares at Sam with wide eyes. His heart pounds in his chest. He'd believed, of course he'd believed, but to hear someone say it- Castiel blinks back tears. He forces his gaze away; he can't stand the pity in Sam's face.

"I could get him for you. Your lover. I could buy him and bring him here."

Castiel shakes his head. He swallows against the tears, but they slip out anyway. "You can't." His voice cracks. "He's- his alpha wouldn't let him go. His alpha would sooner kill him than let someone else have him."

Sam makes a noise in the back of his throat, a low growl that has Castiel pressing back into his pillows, head lowered, shoulders hunched. Sam cuts himself off. He clears his throat, but he doesn't say anything.

Castiel waits for him to speak first.

Finally Sam sighs. "Look, can I- Can I show you my brother? Maybe you know him."

Castiel frowns at the bed. He shrugs. He doesn't know many other omegas. Most of them had been through Dean.

Sam shifts in his chair. Castiel glances up to watch him pull his wallet out of his back pocket. He thumbs it open and flips through it before he pulls out a photograph. He stares at it for a moment before he holds it out to Castiel. When Castiel doesn't reach out for it, he sets it on the bed and pushes it toward him.

Castiel waits until Sam sits back in his chair before he picks it up. It's a picture of two boys, one still a child, the other a teenager maybe. Sam must be the younger from what he's said so far. His face is soft and round. His brother is just as soft. He grins widely at the camera; he must have not presented yet to look so happy still. Castiel frowns at the photo. Sam's brother has Adam's smile, the same smile that made Castiel think of Dean so readily. Like Dean, Sam's brother is freckled, but his hair is lighter, a soft brown bleached with sunlight. Castiel wonders if this was how Dean looked when he was younger. If this boy could have been Dean in a different life. Castiel touches his finger to the picture.

"My dad was a jerk," Sam says suddenly, startling Castiel into looking at him. Sam's eyes are on Castiel's fingers.

"He was gone a lot, left my brother to look after me. We all thought Dean would present alpha, but he didn't." Sam rubs his forehead, oblivious to Castiel's shock. "I don't think my dad ever forgave him for it." Sam snorts and looks up at Castiel. He blinks, eyes going wide as he looks at Castiel. "What?"

Castiel covers his mouth with his hand. He rips his eyes away from Sam to stare at the photo again. To stare at _Dean_. He doesn't realizes he's crying until his chest hitches painfully. 

"Castiel, what's wrong?" Sam stands by his bed, hands hovering in mid-air. 

Castiel shakes his head. He presses the photo to his chest.

Sam leaves him then, only to return with Meg. She crawls into his bed and wraps her arms around him.

"What did you do?" she snaps at Sam.

"Nothing! I was just telling him about my brother and he started crying."

"And you don't think hearing about how your brother was sold would-"

"No," Castiel gasps. He holds the photo out. "Dean." _Dean_. His Dean.

Sam and Meg look at each other. Meg reaches out to take the photo, but Castiel pulls it away.

"It's Dean," he says again, and she gets it.

"Your omega is Dean." She looks up at Sam.

"His-" Sam sits on the edge of the bed. He reaches out for Castiel, stopping when Castiel presses himself back against the wall.

"Dean is your- your omega." Sam stumbles over the words, like he doesn't know how to say them.

Castiel nods. He looks down at the picture again, seeing the ways that this boy grew up into the man he knows now. He doesn't know how he missed it the first time. He remembers the way Adam's smile had stung him, and it makes sense suddenly.

"You said his alpha-" Sam cuts himself off. His hands ball into fists. "Will you tell me about him? So I can get Dean back?"

Castiel looks at Sam. He studies Sam's face, takes in the determination, the hard line of Sam's jaw, the red that edges his pupils. Castiel looks down at the photo of him and Dean. He touches his finger to Dean's face. He nods. This he can do. He could do anything if it meant getting to have Dean back.

 

* * *

 

The doctor lets Castiel get out of bed again after almost a month. He still has to take it easy and he can't climb any stairs, but he can roam the omega wing and the garden as long as he stays close. Meg stays with him most days. Sometimes Jo will walk with him. Castiel sees Adam, but they don't speak. Sam isn't around, and Castiel doesn't ask about him.

A new omega shows up, a young girl with her hair cut off and open sores around her neck and wrists and ankles. Jo cleans her up, wiping down the wounds and bandaging them. Castiel attempts to neaten her hair, but he has no experience with it and the cut ends up almost worse than before. The girl laughs, though, when Jo gets after him, chasing him to the other side of the kitchen. Castiel winks at her and she ducks her head to hide red cheeks.

She's only there for a few weeks before Jo takes her to another one of Sam's properties. She hugs Castiel goodbye, pressing a kiss to his belly.

 

* * *

 

"Castiel, do you feel up to going somewhere with me?" Sam asks from the doorway of Castiel's room.

Castiel sets his book in his lap and frowns at him.

Sam hesitates, then pointed to the Meg's chair. "May I?"

Castiel stares at him for a moment, before tipping his head in acceptance. He tucks a bookmark into place and shifts upward on the bed. His stomach is large, now, and uncomfortable. 

"I've been invited- Dean's alpha, he invited me over for a meal. He said I should bring an omega with me."

"And you want me to go?"

Sam nods. "If you feel up to it. I thought you might like to see Dean again." Sam hesitates, then adds, "And I thought maybe you could tell him. About me. That I want to get him out of there."

Castiel does want to see Dean again. He misses Dean constantly. It's an ache that lives in his chest, squeezes his lungs so tightly he can't breath. It follows him in his dreams, wakes him in the night.

Castiel closes his eyes. He nods.

"Okay." Sam blows out a breath. "Okay. I will find some clothes for you. Do you have a preference?"

"Something covered, please."

Sam smiles slightly. "I'll find you something," Sam promises.

 

* * *

 

In the end, Sam finds him something that's not very different from the swaths of fabric Dean's alpha has him wear. It covers his head, drapes across his face. They're soft and sheer, but Sam finds something for him to wear under it that hides his body from view in a way that Dean’s alpha would never allow- he had always delighted in showing off his omega property.

When Castiel tries it on and looks at himself in the mirror, he realizes that Dean won't recognize him, not until they're excused and he can pull it off. The idea of surprising Dean like this makes Castiel smile.

The doctor is worried about him attending, but Sam promises that he won't have to stand for long periods of time. Sam can't show concern for Castiel, but he can show concern over the baby. Even if it's rare that an alpha is willing to take on another's child, no one will call Sam out on it, especially not with his apparent influence.

Castiel can only be grateful he gets to see Dean again.

 

* * *

 

Castiel stays in bed the days coming up on the party, resting as much as possible. He sleeps in late the day of and lets Sam insist he ride in a wheelchair out to the car. 

At the party, Castiel walks behind Sam, his head tipped down. Covered as he is, Castiel can keep his eyes up.

Sam is greeted at the door by a beta servant. He accepts Sam's coat and ignores Castiel. An omega slave appears out of nowhere and offers Castiel her arm without a word. Castiel accepts it gratefully. She takes his weight easily, young enough it doesn't bother her. They follow Sam into the greeting hall where alphas mingle, talking with each other. The covered omegas with jealous alphas are lined up along a back wall, too far from each other for them to talk even if they had been allowed. The uncovered omegas and the omegas with alphas who had no compunctions about another alpha using their property are lined up at the far side, standing away from the wall, heads tipped down, hands behind their backs, legs spread shoulder width apart.

The omega slave leads him to the other covered omegas and helps him settle onto a couch. He reclines in presentation, the curve of his large belly on display even through layers of fabric.

Castiel's eyes dart from omega to omega, hunting for Dean. He finds Dean in the center of the omegas for display, naked except for the collar he wears, a sign that he's not to be touched. He skinnier than Castiel remembers, the lines of his ribs showing, his collar bones and the bones of his hips standing out in stark contrast. 

Dean's hard, his cock sticking out from his body obscenely, but Castiel knows he's not aroused. There's no flush on his face or neck or shoulders. His cock is pinked with blood, but it doesn't go any darker, doesn't tinge with purple. There's no shine on the head where precome has leaked and no shine between his thighs where he's wet. His alpha must have drugged him. 

Castiel swallows heavily and curls his fists where they're hidden inside the folds of his robes. 

He sits and he watches Dean, though Dean does not move the entire time. Eventually, Dean's alpha calls for his guests to join him for dinner. Some alphas collect their omegas, but most are to wait until the alphas have been seated before joining them.

Sam comes to collect him. Dean's alpha collects him as well, offering his arm. Dean keeps his head and eyes lowered as he sets his hand on his alpha's arm and follows him into the dining room.

During dinner Dean stands just behind his alpha, a little to the left so that he is visible. The guests' omegas either sit or stand similarly. Sam allows him to sit. Castiel doesn't eat- none of the omegas do today. Instead he watches Dean. He stares, absorbing every detail of him, every curve of his body and the shadows they create. He studies what he can of the freckles that dot Dean's skin and the way his hair is a little longer than the last time Castiel saw him. He studies Dean's face, waiting for a chance to see the green of his eyes, but Dean keeps his face down, his eyes focused on the ground.

By the time the alphas release the omegas so they may have privacy, Castiel's fingers itch to touch Dean. He forces himself to keep pace with the others, eyes on the back of Dean's head where he leads them away.

By the time Castiel enters the room, near the end of the line with his heavy body, Dean is nowhere to be seen. Castiel searches for him and finds Charlie sitting outside the bathroom door, talking to another omega woman. She turns when he walks up to her, stretching her arm across the door.

"It's occupied," she tells him. "Can you wait?"

"Charlie, it's me." He pulls on his veils, tugging them loose to reveal his face.

Charlie gapes at him, eyes wide, and then lurches forward to wrap her arms around him. "Oh, Cas! We thought we wouldn't see you again."

He holds her tightly, breathing in her familiar scent. "Me either. Where's Dean?"

Charlie pulls away, her hands tight on his arms. "In the bathroom. He's trying to work out that drug his alpha gave him."

Castiel grimaces. She squeezes his arms, then lets go to turn around and knock on the door.

Dean says something Castiel can't make out.

"Open up," Charlie calls.

Dean growls and yanks the door open. "What?" he growls at her, but his eyes are already darting over her shoulder to land on Castiel's face. His eyes go wide, his mouth dropping open.

"Cas..."

Charlie steps aside and Castiel all but falls into Dean’s arms, holding tightly to him, his face buried in Dean's neck. He doesn't realize he's whimpering until Dean starts rocking him back and forth, his hands running over Castiel's back and through his hair, cooing at him softly.

"Dean," he gasps. He drags Dean down into a kiss. They kiss until Dean pulls back with a curse. He glances down between them. Castiel looks too and can't help the laugh that escapes him; Dean's cock is hard and red, precome beading at the tip.

"I've got to deal with this, Cas."

"Can I stay with you?" he asks, tightening his hold on Dean.

Dean grins. He takes Castiel's hand and leads him into the bathroom. Castiel takes a moment to relieve himself, the baby heavy on his bladder.

Dean makes a thoughtful noise. He still holds Castiel's hand and he runs the fingers of his other hand over Castiel's knuckles.

"Gotta say, you peein' isn't as much of a deterrent as I'da thought."

"Dean."

Dean chuckles. He helps Castiel stand when it becomes apparent his stomach is a hindrance. Dean watches him wash his hands, chewing on his lower lip.

"Cas... is..." He trails off, but Castiel knows what he's asking; it's the same thought that consumed Castiel when he found out all those months ago.

"It's yours," Castiel tells him. 

Dean closes his eyes and swallows thickly. Castiel leans up against the sink and reaches out for him. Dean comes willingly when he pulls, curling against Castiel's body, his face pressed into Castiel's neck. They scent each other, and for the first time in a very long time, Castiel doesn't ache. He feels at peace.

Dean groans and straightens up. "Cas, I really gotta-" He gestures down his body. His cock is still hard and red.

"It's okay," Castiel murmurs. He draws Dean close again. He slides his fingers into Dean's hair and wraps his hand around Dean's cock.

Dean gasps, his hips jerking. "You don't have to-" he starts, but Castiel cuts him off with a dismissive noise.

"I want to."

Dean groans and buries his face in Castiel's neck. He stays there, breathing in Castiel's scent while Castiel strokes him. His hips jerk with each twist of Castiel's wrist and he only pulls away when he's ready to come, jerking off over the toilet with fast, hard strokes, eyes locked on Castiel's.

He comes with a strangled groan, his face twisted in pain. He doesn't give himself time to recover, just flushes the toilet and washes his hands. They leave to let others use the bathroom, a line already formed outside.

Dean leads him to the back corner, the dark, quiet place where they used to make love. He sits Castiel down and the slips into the chair next to him, curling around him carefully, his head tucked into Castiel's neck, a hand stroking over his stomach.

"Is it really mine?" he asks.

Castiel presses a kiss into his hair. "Yes. There's a doctor- he did some kind of test."

Dean lifts his head to stare at Castiel. "Your alpha knows?"

Castiel remembers then why he's here. He hesitates, but then says, "Yes. About him- Dean, it's Sam."

Dean frowns at him. "Sam?"

"He- He says he's your brother."

Dean blinks at him. "My- _Sam_? Sam bought you?"

"Yes."

Dean slips out of the chair to pace the floor in front of it. "What the hell?" He runs his hands through his hair. Castiel reaches out to him; he wears no clothes for Castiel to grab a hold of, so Castiel's fingers slip over the skin of his thighs. Dean stops pacing. He doesn't look down at Castiel, but he takes Castiel's hand and holds it tightly.

"Does this mean- has he-"

"No. Dean." Castiel tugs on his hand. "Sam hasn't touched me. He seems. Well. He said he's been looking for you. He was furious when your father sold you."

"Shit." Dean lets Castiel pull him back into the chair. "Is he still with my dad?"

"I don't know. I never saw him, I don't think."

"Oh, you'd know," Dean said, tone sour. 

Castiel strokes Dean's hair. "There are other omegas," Castiel tells him, "and they like Sam. One of them's your brother."

Dean frowns up at him. "Sam's my only brother."

Castiel shrugs. "One of them said Sam was his brother."

"Huh." Dean twists to press his face into Castiel's neck. "My alpha's never gonna let me go," he mutters into Castiel's skin.

Castiel sighs. "I know."

 

* * *

 

Dean helps Castiel dress again when the party's over. Neither of them can keep their hands from lingering. Castiel can already feel the tears threatening. He knows tonight won't be easy, not for either of them. In the end, Castiel's the last to leave, the two of them clinging to each other. Castiel only lets go when the omega slave knocks for the third time, hissing through the door. Dean kisses him one last time and then lowers the veil over his face.

"Cas..."

"I know." Castiel squeezes his hands. He doesn't want Dean to say the words, not now. "I know, Dean."

The omega slave leads Castiel through the halls to where Sam is waiting. Sam looks him over, but says nothing. His mouth is pulled tight, his shoulders twisted up. He stinks of irritation. Fear pounds through Castiel. His heart beats rapidly and his steps slow as he fights the urge to run. He follows after Sam hesitantly, but there's no escaping being locked in the car with him.

They sit in the back seat together, Sam with his elbow braced against the door, Castiel pressing himself into the corner of the car. Sam's alpha anger is potent and it drowns out the smell of Castiel's fear. When they arrive at the house, Meg is waiting for them with the wheelchair. She opens Castiel's door and the flood of air sends his scent reeling through the car. Sam's head whips around and he stares at Castiel, nostrils flaring.

Castiel presses himself back against the seat, fingers digging in. He'd left the veil in place and it hides the way he stares, waiting for Sam to attack. Sam doesn't; he sags in place and runs his hands over his face.

"Shit. Castiel, I'm sorry."

"Sorry about what?" Meg ducks her head inside the car. She gets a whiff of Castiel's scent and wrinkles her nose. She glares at Sam even as she hooks a hand around Castiel's arm and tugs gently. Castiel follows her, and Sam lets him go.

"Sit," Meg orders and he does. She wheels him into the house and to the omega wing. "You gonna take that off?" she asks.

He shakes his head. In his room, maybe.

When they arrive, she helps him to his feet. He goes to the bathroom first to relieve himself. With the door shut and the lock in place Castiel slowly strips. He pulls on his nightgown, a simple shift that's loose over his breasts and stomach and soft to the touch.

Meg is still waiting for him, but she's shut the door. A glance at it confirms it's locked.

"What did he do?" Meg asks as she helps Castiel into bed.

"He didn't do anything. Just... stank."

Meg purses her lips but doesn't contradict him. He settles in place and lets her pull the blankets up his body.

"Want me to read to you?"

He shakes his head; he wants to be alone.

She studies him for a minute, then pats his hand. "Call if you need anything," she says before she slips out of his room. 

He waits a moment before he climbs out of bed to lock the door. Castiel sits in the middle of his bed and wraps his arms around his stomach. The baby is quiet, unmoving. Castiel wonders if it’s asleep. If they even sleep or wake the way people do. He doesn't know much about babies or being pregnant. He doesn't know what to expect when the time comes. He knows it will be painful. He knows he'll be alone.

Castiel closes his eyes. Tears slip down his cheeks. His chest heaves in silent sobs. He shouldn't have gone. He should have stayed away. Castiel covers his face with his hands. His memory of Dean had faded in the months since they'd been at the spa together. He'd forgotten how green Dean's eyes were and how his scent seemed to settle into Castiel's bones. He'd forgotten the weight of it. He'd forgotten the heat of it.

He can still smell Dean on the skin of his hands. Dean's arousal is worked into his palms. Castiel flattens his hands to the bed, afraid to wipe at his tears. He fists the fabric of his comforter in his fingers and breathes. He draws in deep breathes, sucking in only his scent and Meg's faint scent where it lingers. 

It doesn't help. Nothing helps and Castiel spends the night sitting in his bed trying everything he can think of to not remember.

 

* * *

 

"You want me to leave?" Castiel reels away from Sam where he stands in the doorway.

"Look, your baby's almost here-"

"I won't go!" Castiel shouts at him before he remembers himself. He covers his mouth with his hand, but he still glares at Sam, angry and hateful.

Sam draws in a deep breath. He stares at Castiel with hard eyes.

"What's going on?" Jo asks. She pushes past Sam to come into the kitchen. She takes in Castiel's stance, mouth still covered, his hand braced against the table for balance. She frowns at him, then at Sam.

"Castiel needs to go to the South property."

"Why?" Jo asks at the same time that Castiel barks, "No!"

Jo holds her hand up for silence from Castiel and he bares his teeth at her.

"The baby is due in a few weeks. I want him up there before it comes."

"I won't leave Dean! You're the one who made me- You brought me here and now you won't-" Castiel cuts himself off. He bares his teeth at Sam. He doesn't care if the alpha kills him. He's going to do it anyway, giving him Dean and now taking him away.

"Castiel-" Sam starts. He cuts himself off. "This isn't a debate. You're going."

Castiel growls at him. He wants to leave, but Sam is in the doorway, his large body blocking the way. Castiel is weighed down, trapped by his own body and the baby inside him. 

Sam shakes his head and leaves. Jo sighs and turns to him.

"You have to trust Sam," she tells him.

Castiel pushes himself off the table, ready to go to his room. "He's like any other alpha. Worse because he pretends he's not," Castiel spits.

"Any other alpha would kill you for talking like that!" Jo shouts after him.

"Maybe he should," Castiel retorts over his shoulder. He leaves Jo there and locks himself in his room. Someone knocks some time later, but leaves again when he ignores them. Meg comes even later, banging on the door until he gives in and opens it.

She carries a tray of food and sets it on the foot of his bed.

"I talked to Jo," she says as she drops down into her chair.

Castiel pulls the tray close to himself and pokes at the sandwich. He grimaces and doesn't eat, the smell of it turning his stomach. He doesn't say anything.

"I've been down there. It's not so bad."

Castiel leans back against the wall and runs his hands over his stomach. Meg sighs.

"You gotta go, Clarence."

Castiel rolls his eyes.

"I'll go with you," she offers. 

Castiel looks at her and frowns. "You like it here," he says, breaking his silence. She flashes a grin at him, but it fades quickly.

"Yeah, but I like you too."

"I want to be with Dean."

"I know, but you can't."

"Then I can be close to him. He wants to send me hours away."

Meg stares at him. Her eyes are large and wet and he hates it. He hates her, suddenly and fiercely. He hates Sam and he hates this baby because all he wants to do is throw things. He wants to tear this room apart, to destroy this room and this house. He wants to break Sam and make him regret ever stepping foot in the auction house. He wants to kill Sam and his alpha and Dean's alpha. He wants to take everything from them so they know what it's like to never have anything at all.

He doesn't realize he's crying until Meg wraps her arms around him. She rocks him, shushing him under her breath. It helps and it hurts. She's not Dean, but he can't have Dean. He couldn't ever have Dean, and every time he'd prayed for it, every time he'd hoped for it, he'd been lying to himself.

He was never supposed to believe the lies, but somewhere along the way he had.

He curls into a ball around his stomach and thinks that he has no one but himself to blame.

 

* * *

 

Meg is the only one he talks to. He doesn't bother with Jo or Adam. He ignores Sam's attempts to explain, glaring at him until he leaves, smelling like bitter frustration. The doctor tells him he needs to calm down; the stress isn't good for the baby. Castiel glares at him too.

His room reeks. Meg forces him to open a window and spends her time flapping her hands round.

He watches her and makes no move to help.

She does end up coming with him when it's time for him to leave. She packs both their things, stacking bags in the hallway. Castiel doesn't care what she packs with the exception of a couple of books and the ultrasound picture. Sam comes to check on them and Castiel glares at him until he leaves.

They take a train, Castiel too far along to fly and needing to use the bathroom too often to drive. They have a private room with their own toilet and chairs that fold down into beds. Castiel takes the one by the window and spends the two day trip looking out the window, watching the world slip by as he gets further and further away from Dean.

The South property is in the country. They take a car from the train station, pass through a small village, and then drive down a long winding road that's unpaved. They stop once, cattle blocking the way. Castiel and Meg watch from the car as the driver gets out and shoos them off the road.

The house is as sprawling as the mansion they'd left behind, though it is only single-story. Meg and Castiel have rooms near the back of it. Castiel finds that he's been given a large room, large enough for two to live in. He has his own bathroom and an attached nursery. The baby's room is undecorated, but there's a crib and a changing table. A dresser sits in the corner and Castiel opens drawers to find baby clothes. He shuts the drawers again and goes back to his room. He stands in the middle of it and stares at the double bed and he hates Sam a little bit more.

 

* * *

 

He has nightmares. He wakes screaming, his stomach clenching in fear. He stumbles into the bathroom where he retches into the toilet. Meg appears, scowling and blinking sleep from her eyes. She gripes at him, but her hands are gentle when she runs a wet washcloth over his face and when she helps him change his sweat-soaked clothes.

She sleeps next to him in the bed. She's silent and still. He wonders if he'd be able to pretend he's sleeping next to Dean if he closes his eyes, but even the thought of it hurts too much for him to try. Instead, he lies awake and stares at the window, the curtains cracked. He gets up to drag them open. He spends the night in the rocking chair that had once been in the nursery. He watches clouds crawl across the sky, blotting out stars. He watches the sky change colors. He watches the world come to life outside his bedroom window and he feels the distance. He wonders if this is what it is to be dead.

 

* * *

 

The baby comes early. Castiel wakes in the middle of the night, gasping, the bed wet between his thighs. He jostles Meg awake and she runs to get the doctor who lives here, a beta woman who is much kinder than the man they'd left behind. The baby takes almost a day. Castiel cries for Dean, but it's Meg who holds his hand and encourages him to breathe. It's Meg who's there when the baby is born. Meg is the first person to hold his daughter aside from himself and the doctor.

The doctor settles his daughter in his arms and asks what her name is. Castiel stares down at her. He never picked one. He never thought about it, because he'd never believed he'd get to keep her.

The doctor smiles at him sadly and pats his arm.

"You can take your time," she says. "Think about it."

She cleans him up and leaves him and Meg alone together. A nurse comes by and shows him how to feed his daughter. She latches easily and drinks her fill. When she's asleep, Meg tucks herself into the bed beside Castiel.

"You don't have any names?"

Castiel shakes his head. He runs the tips of his fingers over her skull. She's got soft downy hair. It stands up on end, chasing after his fingers. Her eyes are blue, but the doctor had told him they may change. Castiel doesn't know if he wants them to stay blue or shift to green.

"What about Meg?"

Castiel snorts. His baby fusses, but falls back asleep easily enough when he rocks her.

"Cassie?"

"No."

"Deanie."

Castiel wrinkles his nose. He's not opposed to naming her after Dean, but definitely not that.

"You really don't have any names?"

"Why would I?" Castiel asks. 

Meg sighs. "Yeah, I guess."

Castiel rests his head back against his pillow. He watches his daughter's face twitch in her sleep until he, too, falls asleep. When he wakes, he's alone. He panics, scrabbling at the sheets, trying to get out of the bed. A nurse runs in and pushes him back.

"Hey, hey! It's okay! You're okay!"

"My baby!"

"She's in the nursery." The nurse shakes him. "She's okay and she's in the nursery. Your friend took her there when you feel asleep."

"I want her!"

"That's fine, but you have to calm down."

Castiel forces himself to breathe deeply. His fingers are twisted in the nurse's top and he forces himself to let go. His body aches, and he leans back with a groan.

"Do you want her to sleep in here?" the nurse asks.

Castiel nods.

She leaves and when she returns she's pushing a bassinet. She parks it next to his bed. Castiel leans over to see his daughter swaddled in a blanket, blinking sleepily at him. The nurse touches his arm.

"We'll leave her in here," she says. Castiel rests his hand against his daughter's stomach and feels her breathe.

"Yes. Thank you."

"No problem, hun." She leaves them alone, then. Castiel watches his daughter until she wakes and demands his attention.

He doesn't let her out of his sight after that.

 

* * *

 

Dayna is three months old when Meg finds Castiel in the library. She sleeps against his chest, her fists twisted into the fabric of his shirt. Castiel curves a hand under her butt, providing extra support even though she rests comfortably in her sling. He reads a book on child development, only understanding every third word. One of the beta housekeepers had found him a notebook and Castiel writes down everything he has questions on.

He realizes Meg is still standing in the doorway, watching him read. He lowers his book and turns to her.

"Is something wrong?"

She purses her lips and comes to sit across from him. "Not wrong exactly."

"What's happened?"

His scent spikes. Dayna shifts against him and whines. Meg reaches out and touches his knee. 

"Nothing bad. Don't do that."

"Then tell me-"

"Sam's coming."

Castiel frowns at her. He dislikes Sam, but he doesn't know why Sam's presence here would warrant such caution. Meg watches him carefully.

"He won't be alone."

"Who is coming with him?"

Meg draws in a deep breath. "Dean," she says. "He's bringing Dean here."

Castiel shakes his head; surely he heard wrong. "Did you-"

Meg's fingers tighten around his knee. "Sam got Dean. He's bringing him here. He's bringing him to you."

Castiel stares at her. The book slips out of his fingers. It thumps against the floor, nearly silent in the thick carpet.

"But Dean's alpha..."

"I don't know, Castiel. I just talked to Sam and he said he was bringing Dean. They'll be here tomorrow."

"Dean can't come. His alpha won't let him."

Meg groans. She grabs his head, holding tightly. She stares into his eyes. "Sam has Dean," she repeats. "He got Dean away from his alpha."

Castiel blinks. He reaches up to touch her hand lightly.

"Dean's coming here, Castiel."

"Can he stay?" he asks, voice wavering.

"Yes." Meg's voice is firm, solid. She shakes his head a little. "He's coming here _to you_."

Castiel tries to draw in a breath, but it catches in his throat. Tears well up and then overflow. Meg tugs him forward, resting his head against her shoulder. She pats his back. Between them Dayna fusses. Castiel wraps his arms around her and holds her gently. He pulls back to look down at her.

"Dean's coming here," he tells her. Meg huffs and sits back.

"Now he's got it."

Castiel glares at her. He rubs at his cheeks. "When will he be here?"

"Tomorrow."

"I need to clean up the room." Castiel stands and then hesitates. "He will be..."

"He's all yours, man." Meg grins at him. "Sam's bringing him here for you, Clarence."

"Okay." He nods. "Good." 

He heads for his room. It's a mess, most of his concern taken with Dayna's care. He gets her settled in bed and starts cleaning. He throws clothes in a pile by his door to take to the laundry room. He strips his bed and goes hunting for clean sheets. There are none in his closet, so he leaves to search for some in the closet near the laundry room.

He stops just inside the door when he returns and looks at the room. Dayna makes soft noises in her crib, which sits next to the bed. The double bed. The room has two dressers and the closet is large enough for two sets of clothes. Castiel remembers the way the bathroom had two towels hanging on the rod next to the shower. Hooks to hold two wash clothes stuck to the wall. Two shelves for bottles of shampoo and soap.

The sheets slip from his fingers. He'd assumed the room had been built for two because of the nursery, but it had held everything needed for two. Castiel covers his face with his hands. His chest jerks with heavy sobs.

In her crib Dayna shrieks. Castiel scrubs at his cheeks and crosses the room to check on her. She waves her hands at him, blowing spit bubbles. Castiel lifts her up, cradling her close to his chest. He sinks to the floor.

"Your daddy's coming home," he whispers to her. "Your Uncle Sam is bringing him home." Castiel swallows thickly. "He was always going to bring him home." 

Dayna coos at him and hits him with her fists. He catches her hand and laughs wetly. He kisses her forehead and closes his eyes. He draws in a deep breath. 

Dean's coming home.

 

* * *

 

"Let me have her."

"No."

"Castiel."

Castiel glares at Meg, but she jerks her hands again, wiggling her fingers. 

"I'm not taking her away," Meg says again. She glares at him in irritation, but her scent holds steady. "You don't want her getting squished."

"She won't get squished!"

Meg rolls her eyes. "Just give her here."

Castiel looks down at Dayna. She looks back up at him with wide eyes and burps, startling a laugh from Castiel. He kisses her head and sighs.

"Fine." Carefully, he lifts her from the sling and lets Meg hold her. She cradles Dayna, tickling her tummy lightly.

"Your daddy's a turd," she coos at Dayna, who waves her hand.

"Meg!"

Meg shrugs. "She's gotta learn the truth some day." Meg winks at him, but before Castiel can respond, the sound of tires on gravel becomes audible.

Castiel spins and watches as a car rounds the last bend in the road before reaching the house. The car bumps up on the paved portion, the tires going silent. Castiel leaves the porch, stopping at the end of the driveway.

The car slows, but before it comes to a complete stop, the back door is flung open and Dean jumps out. He stumbles, but then he's running.

"Cas!" he shouts, and Castiel only has time to take a few steps toward him before Dean is slamming into him, his arms wrapping tight, his face pressed into Castiel neck.

"Cas, Cas, Cas," Dean chants, fingers digging into Castiel skin.

Castiel holds him back tightly, twisting fingers into Dean’s shirt.

"You're here," Cas whispers.

Dean laughs, the sound wet and cracking. "Yeah." He pulls back and cups Castiel's face before kissing him, hard and fierce, wet and salty. Months of separation make the kiss desperate. Castiel kisses back, just as eager.

"I missed you," Dean says when he breaks away only to press his face into Castiel's neck again. Castiel nods.

"Fuck," Dean swears. He grips Castiel's shoulders and pushes away, looking down Castiel's body. "The baby-"

Castiel covers Dean's hands. "Meg has her."

"Meg? Her?"

Castiel turns, gesturing with his chin. Meg stands at the edge of the porch and when they both turn to look at her, Meg lifts Dayna's hand in a little wave. Dean laughs.

"Can I-" he starts.

Castiel nods. He takes Dean's hand and leads him up the stairs. Dean reaches out and rests his hand lightly on Dayna's stomach. She watches him with wide eyes. It's been a long time since she'd met a new person. Her nostrils flare as she takes in Dean's scent. She doesn't complain, just stares at him while he stares at her.

"What's her name?" Dean asks, his voice low and reverent.

"Dayna."

"Hi, Dayna." He wiggles his fingers against her stomach. She slaps at his hand, but grins. "Can I hold her?"

Meg offers her over. Dean holds her carefully, delicately. He cuddles her to his chest and presses his nose against her skull, inhaling deeply. His eyes flutter shut. Castiel twists his fingers into Dean's shirt over his hip.

"Dayna."

"Yes."

"Our daughter's name is Dayna."

Castiel nods, his throat too tight for words. Dean looks over at him, eyes wet. Castiel steps closer, wrapping his arms around both Dean and his daughter. Their daughter.

He doesn't let go until footsteps on the porch startle them all. 

Sam stops a few feet away, watching. He has a large bag slung over his shoulder.

"I have Dean's stuff," he tells them. "Where..."

"With me." Castiel holds out his hands and lets Sam slip the bag off his shoulder. He catches Sam's eyes and holds his gaze.

"Thank you," he says. 

Sam ducks his head. He doesn't look happy, but there's a lightness to him that Castiel has never seen. 

"I'll be around for awhile. If you guys want to have dinner or something."

Castiel draws the bag up his shoulder and looks at Dean. He has yet to look up from his daughter. Castiel looks back at Sam. "Maybe. We'll find you."

 

* * *

 

Dean holds Dayna as he walks their room. He peeks into the closet and their bathroom. He stands in the nursery and looks around. 

"Why doesn't she sleep in here?" he asks, his eyes on the empty space that once held her crib.

Castiel steps close to let Dayna clutch at his finger.

"I didn't want her to be too far away."

Dean looks at him, and Castiel knows he understands.

"I need to feed her, if you want to unpack."

Dean kisses Dayna before he hands her over. Castiel sits on their bed, back braced against the headboard, legs crossed, and watches Dean as Dayna eats. Dean unpacks a few items in between wandering over to watch the two of them. He finally stops and crawls into the bed with them, sitting knee-to-knee with Castiel.

"I missed you," he says softly.

Castiel leans forward to rest his forehead against Dean's. "Me too."

"She's perfect."

Castiel huffs a laugh. Dayna fusses a moment before she settles down again as Dean strokes her hair.

"How'd Sam get you out?" Castiel finally feels brave enough to ask now that they are locked away in their room.

Dean leans back. He leaves his hands resting on Castiel's knees.

"He fought for me. Used some law about family connections to challenge who has rights to me." Dean's tone is bitter, but his scent stays calm. "Is he really..."

Castiel shrugs. "He gave me this room. He never touched me. There was always room for you here, Dean. He never told me, but there was space for two here."

"He's my brother," Dean says. His voice breaks, and Castiel remembers sitting with him in a library, a lifetime ago, in another world. He remembers the art book Dean had dragged into his lap and the way he'd lingered over pictures of brothers. He remembers the sadness that had tainted Dean's scent even if he hadn't understood it then.

Sam is Dean's brother.

But he's also an alpha. An alpha who purchased him and his omega. An alpha who could take their child.

Castiel doesn't know what to tell Dean. He remembers his alpha father and he remembers the day he was sold for the first time. He remembers both of his alphas before Sam. He remembers more than he wants to.

Sam is Dean's brother, but he's an alpha, and they are his property in the ways that matter most.

 

* * *

 

They sleep that night with Dayna tucked between them. She fusses, difficult to get down at first, but the warmth of the bed and the scent of both her parents finally lulls her to sleep. Dean watches her the whole time, his fingers drifting to caress her head, rest on her chest, to curl around her foot. Castiel watches him.

He reaches out to touch Dean's cheek. Dean looks up at him and their eyes catch. Castiel stares at him, taking in the green of his eyes, the lines that have formed around them. The skin under his eyes have darkened with exhaustion. Dean looks tired, but he also looks relieved. He smells like happiness and peace, but also wary. 

Castiel draws in a deep breath. He presses his hand flat to Dean's face. The words sit on the tip of his tongue, words they haven't said to each other, though they both know how true they are. 

Dean covers Castiel's hand and turns his face into Castiel's palm.

"You don't have to say it," Dean tells him, his voice muffled.

"I love you," Castiel says anyway.

Dean huffs a soft laugh. He closes his eyes and kisses Castiel's hand.

"I love you too."

They stay like that until Dean falls asleep, his hand drifting down to the bed, his face slipping from Castiel's hold. Castiel curls a little closer to him, curving his body around Dayna, careful to keep from waking her.

He listens to them both breathe, Dean's gentle snores interspersed with Dayna's soft whimpers. He draws in a deep breath, pulling in Dean's scent mixed with Dayna's, touched with his own.

It's the most perfect thing he's ever smelled. Castiel holds his breath. He wants to keep it inside him for as long as he can. 

He wants to keep them forever.

It keeps him awake, that thought. The thought of Dean and Dayna being his, the thought that he might be able to have this now.

Castiel watches Dayna sleep, running his fingers along the softly rising curve of her ribs. She shifts under his touch, forehead scrunching, hands curling into fists. She breathes in a deep breath, looking as if she might wake, but then she settles with a soft sigh. Dean curls in toward her slightly, drawn by the sound.

Castiel has never allowed himself these kinds of thoughts, never allowed himself to think of Dean in terms of mate and love, not until those few, short weeks hidden away from the world, far from his alpha's reach. He thinks them now. He imagines introducing Dean as his mate. He imagines Dean's neck scarred with his bite. He imagines his own neck scarred with Dean's bite. Castiel's fingers ghost over the curve of his shoulder even as his chest fills with a new kind of wonder, a strange certainty.

Castiel raises his eyes to Dean again. Dean’s face is slack, his mouth open. Spit dampens his cheek and the pillow beneath it. Castiel smiles slightly and resists the urge to reach out and wipe it away just as he's done with Dayna countless times. Instead, he studies Dean's face, catalogues his features. The resemblance to Sam is slight, Castiel thinks. They're both handsome, but Dean has a softer look, his features delicate in a way Sam's are not.

Castiel still doesn't know what to make of Sam, doesn't know if Sam can be trusted. He had started to think that he might be, but it had been too easy for Sam to fall back onto his alpha ownership of Castiel to send him away from Dean. 

Castiel hesitates to trust him, finally and fully, but he thinks about the way Sam had tried. Sam had fought for Dean and made a place for Dean here. He's never intervened for Dayna- he still hasn't even held her. He'd asked once, when she was first born, and Castiel had reeled away, arms tight around Dayna, making her cry out, his fear a sour stink in the air. Sam had backed away, hands raised.

He never asked again, but sometimes, when Sam thinks Castiel isn't paying attention, Sam watches her, a sad desperation on his face. Castiel sees it though; he is always aware of Sam, watching him from the corner of his eye when they're in a room together, and he sees it.

He sees how Sam will lean forward toward her, his eyes riveted on her, his attention solely for her. He'll reach out, fingers twitching, and then he'll pull away, resignation heavy in his face and in the way he'll tuck his hands in his pockets or pick up something to hold white-knuckled. 

He doesn't say anything to Castiel, and it makes Castiel curious.

Dean sighs and adjusts his head on the pillow. He makes a soft noise in his throat, forehead furrowing, the same as Dayna's. He doesn't settle as easy though, his fingers and legs twitching with his dream. Distress leaks into his scent, and Castiel reaches out and sooths a hand over his head, through his hair.

Dean startles, eyes jerking open, but he immediately relaxes at the sight of Castiel. He grumbles something Castiel can't make out and tucks his face into his pillow. He frowns and lifts his head to glare at the wet spot on it before flipping it over and relaxing again. He's asleep before Castiel can say anything to him, and it makes Castiel smile, wide and full and happy.

Sam doesn't matter, he thinks. He has his mate and he has his baby. They are far from the city and they are not the only omegas in this building. Castiel knows there are a few who would side with Sam, but there are more who would die before they would side with an alpha.

If Sam does not give them their freedom, Castiel knows he will find a way to take it. For his daughter if no one else.

That thought, solid and firm, settled into him like a stone, lets Castiel finally close his own eyes and sleep.

 

* * *

 

**Epilogue: 5 Years Later**

Dayna shrieks and chases after Sam, her long hair caught by the breeze. She laughs when he turns suddenly, growling at her and chasing her now. Sam stomps his feet, all but walking since his long stride overtakes hers even at her fastest.

Dean shifts next to Castiel, giving a low groan as he adjusts his weight. He shifts till he's pressed against Castiel's side. Castiel curls his arm around Dean's shoulders, encouraging him to shift again so that he's resting his weight against Castiel, his head on Castiel's shoulder.

"How did you do this?" Dean asks. He tucks his face into Castiel's neck.

"I was carrying one child," Castiel points out.

Dean's only five months along, but he's already as big as Castiel was when he was ready to give birth. 

"Hand," Dean says. 

Castiel reaches out and flattens his palm to Dean's stomach. One of the babies kicks, making Castiel chuckle. Dean sighs.

Dayna runs over and climbs into the chair beside Dean. She holds out a fistful of flowers haphazardly plucked from Castiel’s garden. Dean sits up again and takes them from her, carefully leaning forward to kiss her on the cheek. Dayna giggles and pats Dean's stomach.

Sam stomps up the porch and drops down on the chair across from them. It creaks under his weight, and Castiel eyes it; they'd bought it cheap and he worried about it sometimes given how hard Dayna was on it and how big Sam was.

Dean spreads the flowers out across his stomach, hunting for the ones with the longest stems. Dayna leans forward; she braces her hands on Dean's thigh and watches with interest.

"What're you doin'?" she asks.

"I'm going to make a flower crown," Dean tells her. Castiel watches him for a moment, his hand settled into the curve of Dean’s waist.. He glances over at Sam to find him watching Dean intently.

"I didn't know you could do that," Sam comments.

"Gilda taught us," Castiel says.

Dean ignores them to guide Dayna through braiding stems together. His silence is pointed, and Sam grimaces, looking away. He runs his hands through his hair, pulling it away from his neck to let breeze cool it.

They haven't seen Charlie since they left Sam's property to come here. Her alpha had died, and it had only been chance that Sam had gone to the auction and purchased her. She'd shown up at the Southern property and been delighted to see them; they had been just as excited to see her.

It had also been when they had learned that Sam had been lying to them.

The properties that Sam owned were little more than way-stations, meant to be a single stop on an omega's journey out of the country. They were not, as Sam had implied, new homes for these omegas. Sam owned properties in other countries, countries where it was illegal to own omegas. Their new homes were in places where their alphas could not find them again. They were given houses, helped to find jobs, had their residency sponsored until one of Sam's contacts could help them finalize their citizenship.

Charlie told them about the plans Sam had made for her, walking back and forth in their room, Dayna cradled in her arms. Dean had stared at the wall just behind Charlie's head and the smell of his fury had singed the air for days.

Sam's defense had been Castiel's pregnancy and Dayna's infant-hood. He'd sworn he was going to tell them when he thought they would be able to leave.

Dean had spit angrily that it wasn't his choice; it was theirs, it should have been theirs, and he was no better than any other alpha to believe otherwise.

After that conversation, it had been a few years before Dean had been willing to talk to Sam again.

In an effort to make amends, Sam had worked with Charlie to track down Gilda and attempt to get her from her alpha. He had failed, time and again, Gilda's alpha jealous and domineering. It had taken subterfuge, and Charlie and Gilda disappearing overnight with no warning, for it to work.

They still have not heard from Charlie or Gilda.

Dayna grumbles under her breath and Castiel looks at her to see the small flower crown she'd been working on fall apart. Dean laughs and catches the flowers.

"Here," he says, his voice kind and gentle, patient in a way it only ever is with his daughter. "Like this."

Dean guides her small hands, weaves stems together. Castiel smiles at them, warmth building in his chest. Contentment settles in his limbs, weighs down his bones.

Dayna laughs in delight as Dean helps her tie off the flower crown. She jumps down and comes over to throw herself in Castiel's lap.

"Daddy, look!" Castiel steadies Dayna and ducks his head so that she can set it on the top of his head.

"It's beautiful." Castiel curls his arm around her and settles her into his lap, reaching up to adjust the flower crown. "You did a wonderful job putting it together."

She beams at him, eyes the same fresh grass green as her father's. Castiel presses a soft kiss to her cheek, making her giggle. Dean laughs with her and Castiel turns to kiss his forehead.

Sam watches them, a low, soft smile on his face.

Dayna relaxes into Castiel, her head settling against his shoulder. As Dayna drifts, Castiel watches the sky change colors. Orange and red streak across it, the fading light turning the few lingering clouds a dark purple. Slowly, they melt into the sky, nearly indistinguishable from the dark blue. He sees the North Star first, glowing low and bright, and then other stars peek out, dappling the night sky.

Dayna's soft snore draws his attention downward. He smiles at his daughter even as Dean chuckles quietly.

"Time to get to-" Dean starts only to interrupt himself with a yawn. He blinks, startled and sleepy, afterwards, and Castiel kisses the corner of his mouth with a smile.

Castiel stands with Dayna; he shifts her carefully, but she still wakes and shoves her head into his neck with a petulant whine. Sam helps Dean stand and the three of them head into the house. Sam says goodnight to them both, caressing Dayna's head when she doesn't wake.

He heads for the guest bedroom on the opposite side of the house. It had once contained two sets of bunk beds, a place for a small group of omegas to hide until safe homes could be found for them. In the year before Castiel and Dean had moved here, Sam had stopped using it; someone's alpha had found it and tried to enter it, and it had been decided it was no longer safe. A friend of Sam's who lived in the town moved into it, and by the time Castiel and Dean were to come, it was empty again. 

Sam had offered them this place, this house, somewhere far away, in a place where they could live together and raise Dayna without interference. They had both been wary, uncertain about accepting such a gift from Sam. After they had received their citizenship papers, Sam had offered to put it in their names, and they had accepted only once someone else, someone who didn't know Sam, had looked over the paperwork.

It was a small house, with small rooms, but it was quiet and the neighbors were nice. Castiel had started a garden, and Dean had spent months nesting. They'd saved up together, the two of them working odd-end jobs until Castiel had found a full-time job, and bought furniture and curtains and area rugs- things neither of them had ever owned before. 

It makes Castiel's heart pound to come home to Dean and Dayna in their own house. It had once given him nightmares and left him shaking under the weight of the fear that it would all be taken away. Dean would wrap himself around Castiel and hold him close until the fear faded. Sometimes it still does, but...

Day after day, it fades.

Day after day, Castiel wakes in his own bedroom, his husband warm by his side.

Day after day, Castiel wakes his daughter and gets her ready for school.

Day after day, Castiel drives to his workplace, where people smile at him and no one touches him without permission, not even the alphas he comes into contact with.

Day after day, Castiel comes home and it _is_ his home. Dean is his husband, and they have their daughter with two more children on the way, and no one can take any of them away from him.

Not anymore.


End file.
